Texas Chainsaw Massacre – Review

Rating: 1.5 out of 5.

Following the fad of classic franchises retconning their projects to give us a ‘true’ sequel – something the Ghostbusters, Terminator and Halloween franchises have most recently attempted – The Texas Chainsaw Massacre is the latest to receive a futile facelift (pun intended) with the chainsaw wielding psychopath ‘Leatherface’ making a reappearance.

Ignoring the many other sequels and reboots that this franchise has barfed out over the years, director David Blue Garcia brings us a direct sequel to Tobe Hooper’s 1974 horror classic, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Set 50 years after the original events, a group of young ‘influential entrepreneurs’ seek to gentrify the remote Texan town of Harlow. But they soon discover that a dark secret lurks within the abandonment of the town, and he’s not so giddy about the potential uplift that will be bestowed upon his town.

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Having seen the ’74 classic once, and very little of the projects that followed, the Texas chainsaw franchise is one that I don’t hold dear, but with this recent reboot receiving the streaming gig on Netflix, and a runtime that doesn’t even reach the 90 minute mark I felt it was worth my time. Sadly though, this entry operates much like an old rusty chainsaw, with the chain slipping off of the blade before it can even gain any momentum, and no matter how hard it tries to get it roaring there simply isn’t enough gas there.

The likes of the Terminator and Halloween franchises at least had some reasonable cause to bring back their original product. With their lead heroine’s making a return after lengthy disappearances from their respective series’, it was a chance to inject some interest back into the franchises that had long lost their grip. Sadly with the death of both the original Leatherface Gunnar Hanson and Sally Hardesty (Marilyn Burns), Texas Chainsaw Massacre fails to provide that longing feeling of being reunited with a familiar face, offering only a outer shell of its much better self.

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Of course there’s more chainsaw twirling carnage to entertain the easiest of horror fans, but beyond the insipid onslaught from the grunting giant, there’s little at face value (pun intended) that is worth raving about. Going the streaming site route was definitely the better option, with a theatre release most probably stretching problematic results.

There’s a hint for a possible sequel in the franchise’s future, but if they can’t find a way of shedding the formulaic structure of an overly saturated slasher market, then I can see this rehash bearing the same disappointing results that the previous entries have left in its wake.

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